Search

Report: Driscoll To Start Serving Beer Because It’s The Grown-Up Dining Hall



Recently, Williams students have been pushing for the restoration of pre-covid campus culture. With public health and the college’s historic liberal reputation in mind, the Williams administration has been racing for ways to appease students without hosting the “massive mask-burning party” requested by many. The Williams administration has worked extensively with dining services to unveil beer on tap now available at Driscoll. Dubbed “Beers with Your Peers”, President Maud Mandel latest email states that “the ability for our of-maturity students to enjoy a cold one together will mend the social scars cut by the coronavirus. Good beer. Good times. Driscoll dining.”


Haystack reporters met with President Mandel to discuss this new change. When asked about the choice of dining hall, Mandel stated, “Because it’s the dining hall for grown-ups. We built a dining hall into Mission to keep the little kids down there. We put Frosh Quad right next to the Paresky Center for a similar reason.” Mandel pauses for another sip of her Guinness. Did you study abroad in Ireland? We ask. How could you tell! Mandel replies. “If we were to allow beer in, say, Whitman’s, we would need someone to do a holistic review of each student’s maturity before serving them. At Driscoll we have no need to worry about such a thing, if you know where Driscoll is, if you can cross Route 2 on your own, you can have a beer. With your peers.”.


The student body is expressing joyful support for this new campus change. Henry Clicks ‘22 is in full support of the administration’s recognition of Driscoll as the grown-up dining hall. “My dilemma for the majority of my time at Williams has been that I would love a beer with dinner every now and again, but I’m on the meal plan, and we aren’t allowed to bring beer to the dining hall!”. Clicks is grateful for the trust the administration is putting in the students, “I’m glad they are trusting the grown-ups to drink responsibly. I’d imagine younger kids might not know when it’s okay to drink beer. If you put beer in the kid’s dining halls I bet they’d have it with breakfast. They have so much to learn.”.


Maxwell Newton ‘23 was relieved to hear about this change from across the pond at Oxford University. “I woke up and checked my Oxford email, and then my Williams email, and I was proper pleased to hear about the new Beers with Your Peers programme at Driscoll! After spending a trimester at Exeter, I began waking up in a cold sweat from nightmares about not having a local pub for me and my mates to grab pints at back over in the Colonies. Where is a lad to watch football? I’m so thankful that Williams is finally bringing real culture into the Uni. God bless the Queen.”. Newton ended our call citing “tea time”. Okay.


President Mandel wants to clarify that beer will NOT be available with to-go mobile orders using the GET app, but reminds all students to download the GET app for increased dining options and hours from Lee’s, ‘82 Grill, and Fresh ‘n Go through mobile ordering using the GET app.