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thewilliamshaystack
  • Oct 30, 2021

Man wearing t-shirt to halloween party is smarter than you

Hundreds of cat-ear headbands. A few tastefully sexy firefighters. Some less tastefully sexy firefighters, one tiny scrap of fabric away...
I Lived It: I Joined Rock Climbing Club and Now I've Been Stuck in a Rock for 127 Hours
Isaac Wilkins
  • Oct 28, 2021

I Lived It: I Joined Rock Climbing Club and Now I've Been Stuck in a Rock for 127 Hours

“It’ll be a good way to make new friends,” she said. “It’ll help you meet girls and get over your crippling fear of ropes and pulleys,”...
Friend Who Ordered Hot Chocolate at Tunnel Swears They're Not a Little Baby Boy
Sophie Bellwoar and Lucy Walker
  • Oct 28, 2021

Friend Who Ordered Hot Chocolate at Tunnel Swears They're Not a Little Baby Boy

Last week, Haystack reporters were positioned in Tunnel City Coffee Shop where we witnessed Jeremy Pickles ‘23 unabashedly order a small...
Report: You Were REALLY Loud Getting Your Computer Charger Out in Sawyer
Lizzie High
  • Oct 28, 2021

Report: You Were REALLY Loud Getting Your Computer Charger Out in Sawyer

Yep, this article is about you. There’s no need to deny it, no need to be shy, everyone already knows you were the one making all that...
Report: Spring Street Dog Looks Rich
Lucy Walker
  • Oct 28, 2021

Report: Spring Street Dog Looks Rich

After the long weekend, the Haystack received several reports of well-to-do looking dogs on Spring Street. The dogs, notable because they...
Alpha Males Playing Spikeball Shirtless Look Handsome, Free Spirited
thewilliamshaystack
  • Oct 22, 2021

Alpha Males Playing Spikeball Shirtless Look Handsome, Free Spirited

Multiple students corroborated reports yesterday of a group of four muscular, particularly well-adjusted students playing a friendly—but...
"Ok, Who Got Me Sick?" Says Kid Who Licked Every Doorknob on Hoxsey
Melia Hagino
  • Oct 11, 2021

"Ok, Who Got Me Sick?" Says Kid Who Licked Every Doorknob on Hoxsey

Last night, Jeffery Tinkle ‘23 announced via 6 separate Instagram stories that he had launched an internal investigation to find out who...
Improv Comedy Kid Keeps Trying to Do Scenes Where He Has a Girlfriend
Kevin Ryan
  • Oct 6, 2021

Improv Comedy Kid Keeps Trying to Do Scenes Where He Has a Girlfriend

“Ok, so what if I was like a firefighter with like a funny top hat, and I also had like a really hot cool and thoughtful girlfriend....
Mission Dining One-Ups Whitman’s With not Uno, not Dos, not Tres, but QUATRO LECHES CAKE
thewilliamshaystack
  • Oct 5, 2021

Mission Dining One-Ups Whitman’s With not Uno, not Dos, not Tres, but QUATRO LECHES CAKE

“At first it was delicious,” said Bruce Barbeque ‘23. “Then I got to the fourth leches, right at the very bottom of the cake, and…”...
Guy Talking a Lot in Your PoliSci Class Not Tall Enough to be President
Noah Cohen-Greenberg and Sam Mermin
  • Oct 4, 2021

Guy Talking a Lot in Your PoliSci Class Not Tall Enough to be President

Thursday afternoon’s meeting of PSCI 124: Leaders, Heroes, Geniuses, Brotherhood was marked by a slew of passionate comments from Jackson...
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Editorial Board

Noah Cohen-Greenberg     Sam Mermin     Lucy Walker

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Writing Staff

Asher Gladstone     Melia Hagino     Lizzie High     Mati Rogers     Kevin Ryan

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Social Media

Sara Stebbins     Shenba Vairavan     Darlie Kerns